You Didn’t have to Cut Me Off

Anyone here listen to this song before?

I’m sure most of you have. It’s a pretty famous song, and a really famous music video.

It’s on my mind tonight. My dear, dear friend and roommate Jay Cooper has had two people – that he considered close and dear friends – cut him off over the past 7 days. No warning, no real explanation, no settling of accounts or discussion of the matter. Just blink – nothing.

It’s not a pretty sight, what I’m seeing right now. It’s very sad, upsetting, stressful, and heartbreaking to see someone going through this. I imagine it like losing my dear, dear friend Chris (there are some vacation pictures of me and him together on this site), or losing Jay himself. If those people suddenly decided, out of the blue, that I was a horrible person, blocked me everywhere, refused to talk to me, and so on… well, I’d probably break down and be a huge mess for a very long time.

Not pretty.

So, to all of you out there. Don’t cut people off. Don’t stay quiet. If you have a problem with someone, talk to them about it and settle it like as a grown man does. If you need to part ways, do so as a man does, at least by telling them why you need to part. It’s a scary thing to do, but here’s what happens if you don’t…

1) You will destroy the other person. They will have to find out for themselves, or invent for themselves, why you suddenly disappeared from their lives. Anxiety, self-doubt, and depression will destroy them.

2) You will be creating a mess that other people have to deal with and clean up. It’s selfish to force other people to make up for your disappearance, when really the only people who should be involved are the two affected friends.

Don’t cut people off. You’re being selfish, and you’re avoiding your own responsibilities to the human beings in your life.

That’s all I have to say about that for now.